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The Joy of Becoming a “Regular”


There is so much power, love, and pure joy in humanity—especially when we choose to seek it out. 

This past January, we decided that we wanted to try something new. We wanted to start going to a coffee shop in our neighborhood a few times a week to try to become “regulars”. 

We found a coffee shop we loved in the Upper East Side, starting going back regularly, having delightful conversation with the staff and baristas, and, as time progressed, we finally had the movie-esque conversation:

“Whaddl-ya-have today?” the barista asks politely. 

“The usual.” I say over excitedly. 

Ah, isn’t that the best?! It feels so main character. 

In all seriousness, we felt that this was something we missed from living in the south and were severely craving that human connection with a coffee shop, restaurant, or bar (in a healthy way), especially during the winter time. The winter is a great time to become a regular. 

The familiarity in the colder months creates a social warmth to carry you through the shorter days. Especially if you’re in a new or larger city, becoming a regular makes you feel more at home in your neighborhood and brings a warm sense of community to it. It’s something we all truly need. There is something that is so refreshing for the soul about becoming a regular. 

In a time when–especially in the city–people are hustling to get out of the cold and aren’t stopping and chatting outside as much as usual, finding that familiar feeling goes further than you might think.

Instead of being cooped up in your apartment, it is such a wonderful experience to throw on your warm clothes, brace the freezing cold for a short time, and go relax in your favorite neighborhood spot. It feels homey, welcoming, and simply magical having someone recognize you, say your name, and remember your order. 

It’s really, really special. 

And not only do you become a regular, you become a friend and you gain a friend. 

Simply put, it’s the best and we highly, highly recommend it! 

And I understand it may seem intimidating or impossible thinking that you live in a place where someone might remember your face, your order, or your name—but I promise, you are unforgettable and it is not only possible, but beautiful



• leave a comment •

  1. Carol says:

    What a great idea as I moved to a new city during the pandemic and have never really felt a part of it. There’s a wonderful coffee shop within walking distance of my condo and I’m going to start going with the ultimate goal of becoming a “regular”. Thanks for the wonderful suggestion.

    • Nathan Page says:

      That’s so fun, Carol! It’s been a great way to feel a bit more at home in a new place. We hope it is for you, too!

  2. Margaret Eker says:

    Love this—going to try it at the neighborhood restaurant in Austin—Mamma Betty’s 🙌

  3. Rebecca R Pappas says:

    I love this! I must find a place and do this 🙂

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