Yves Saint Laurent once said, “Fashions fade. Style is eternal.”
Ugh–what a good quote, right? While this might be true, it is incredibly difficult to enact in our lives. The confidence to get to the point of feeling like you have a style that won’t dissipate with time and as the trends come-and-go is not an easy conclusion to get to.
Finding your style is something that takes time — a lot of time.
I remember being in middle school and watching everyone discover their music “niche”. (Who knew middle schoolers could be so pretentious?) They strictly stuck to that genre — the genre reflected other parts of their personality, like their attitude, fashion, etc. If they enjoyed alternative or indie music, they would rock Chacos and Patagonia, or combat boots and flannels. If they leaned more pop-punk, they would dress like a rockstar (vans, skinny jeans, band t-shirts). Emo? Well, we all remember the regrettable phases people went through — let’s just say .
During this period, I felt so lost because I loved so many different types of music: anything from Frank Sinatra to Miley Cyrus to Foo Fighters to Eminem and Lil Wayne. And, as a kid, this was super confusing because I didn’t know how to dress (or act) accordingly.
Even in adulthood, I see this happening. Especially with social media being so prevalent in our lives, it feels that there can be that same type of pressure to find your box and stay in it.
But that couldn’t be further from reality!
Discovering your style is something that can be ever-evolving and never-ending. And this is not to be confused with trends and fashion that only stays en vogue for a season, but with personal style that remains classic, timeless, and what makes you feel your best self.
If you look in your closet and want to throw everything away: we see you, we feel you, we hear you. We get it (trust me). When you feel like your wardrobe is random, incohesive, and simply doesn’t spark any level of joy–it might be time for a change.
What I recommend for a smoother transition into discovering your style is to first, give yourself grace and recognize that you will figure this out. It will be difficult; there may be blood, sweat, and tears–but you will come out stronger and more confident than ever before!
Pull everything out of your closet. Yes, everything.
Even those coats in the back that you’re saving for a special occasion or for the “right time” to wear. Pull it all out. Even your dresser drawers. And any storage bins of clothes you may or may not have. Turn it into a re-organizing and decluttering day!
First, sift through what you really love to wear, what you feel meh wearing, and the items that no longer spark joy. This may sound drastic, but donate the meh and no-longer-sparking-joy items; it’s so much easier to feel a connection with your style when you love everything in your closet!
Then you need to look at what you have and note if you see any trends: what you like, what you feel confident and comfortable in, and what type of pieces you want to grow in your closet.
I think we all go through a period of re-wearing the same type of outfit or noticing ourselves gravitating towards a certain outfit for a specific occasion, and that is fine! However, how amazing would it be to attempt to try to make nearly every outfit in your closet feel the way that *one* outfit makes you feel? You know the outfit.
Once you’ve figured this out, I highly recommend spending some time sifting through Pinterest, your favorite IG fashion follows, TikTok — even magazines or a general internet search — and save items that you feel you would feel all-around good in. I am so pro-Pinterest board it’s criminal. Mood boards are extraordinarily helpful, inspiring, and downright fabulous.
If you see a character in a movie wearing an outfit you like, screenshot it! If you see an outfit you like in a magazine, rip it out! If you see an outfit on Pinterest, pin it!
When you feel you’ve spent some time thinking and cultivating a decent amount of inspiration for your style, then it’s time to start growing your closet. And it doesn’t have to cost a lot of money at all! You can take your time building, visit thrift stores, and look out for those good deals and sales that come here and there.
Slowly but surely, you will start to have the closet of your dreams and you will feel spectacular everytime you put together an outfit. You deserve to feel confident, comfortable, and stunning in every outfit you wear — and it’s like we always say here, “if you wear something with confidence, people will believe you.”
Each style is unique, just as each of you are exceptionally unique! I wish you the best of luck in the journey of discovering and cultivating your style!